Bridge

I never read as many books as I would like, last year I was gifted with a contact who was actually on the Newbery committee, she threw books at me all year and I felt much a part of the process and in touch with last year's book selections. But this year I am once again on my own and wander through the shelves noting favorite authors and hoping to find new loves. One I tripped over this year was Louis Sachar's most recent YA novel called "The Cardturner." My mother who seldom reads kid books asked me to get her a copy so of course I read it.

This is as story about a young man who for lack of anything better to do, no girl friend, no job, a summer stretching in front of him, turns cards for his blind great-uncle at the local bridge club. Turning cards, turns Alton's life in many directions but never loose. Trapp as his uncle is best known, is something of a crumudgeon, but you'll admit, rightly so, as you learn his history. Trapp's passion for bridge is contagious Alton is soon caught up in his web along with his sister, and an attractive young girl named Toni. Ultimately Toni and Alton help Trapp achieve an ancient desire for a national Bridge championship. You'll have to read it yourself for the details. But beware!

I hate bridge, I was raised by bridge players, there were regular bridge parties when I was growing up. We loved the morning after bridge night, the house reeked of cigarette smoke. Leftover bridge mix, chex mix and some sweet treat became breakfast for the first ones up. But we all learned to play bridge at about the age of 10, or started to. You sat at the table and they talked you through bidding, counting your points, and were forever saying things like "Well you Know he has the queen of hearts..." I never thought this was fun, it always required copious amount of mental concentration. You had to remember what was played, who played it, what was trump, and why you were sitting there at all. I never understood how you could ever carry on even a simple conversation while playing, and I really preferred talking. So after a couple of years I never volunteered to be the fourth, I usually found a hiding spot till the table was full. I knew I hated bridge, I could barely tolerate Hearts or Spades, which required much less effort than bridge. But after reading this book, I just knew I wanted to learn to play bridge again.

I wasn't alone in this desire. I have one daughter who abhors all sitdown games, board, card, doesn't matter she doesn't want to play. We were listening to "The Cardturner" and about halfway through my eldest says "We should really learn to play bridge." A voice from the back seat joins in "Grandma would teach us." "Miss No Games" from the third row back says "I think I could learn to play." I was shocked, but knew then it wasn't just me, this book creates a desire in the audience to play bridge.

Trapp was aptly named!

I have six years to find a job. When my youngest two head to college at the same time additional money sources will be required. Believe it or not when I was young and in the throes of women's liberation, watching weekly protests of all sorts of oppression, I really only wanted to be one thing, and that was a mother. This wasn't something a young college female would admit at that time, well, yes many would admit to the desire for motherhood, but not for the entire stay at home mother package. We were expected to want more, it was the only way you could be fullfilled, that stay at home parenting was so passe, so boring. You would lose yourself and never maximize your potential. Besides, you could always have children AND a job, no problem. 'Twas hogwash then and remains so.

We have learned in the intervening 30 years that parenting in a dual income household is frought with problems. I know I tried it. With only one child and an amazing childcare provider but it was still challenging. I really marvel at those who continue to live that life and wonder what they choose to leave out. Sleep? Family dinner? I know there are omissions because you really can't have it all. I remember trying and exhausting my self and can't imagine how you can do it with teenagers who are so like overgrown toddlers with their needs. I am sure that our plethera of communication choices offers more options for staying in touch, but I know it doesn't replace being there. Raising childen at home is a full time job, so if you work outside the home you have at least two full time jobs, that's 80 hours of work in a good week. When I did work outside the home what I missed most was just not being there to witness the marvel of my children. It is moments that can take your breath away and bring tears to your eyes, and they are just moments, flashes and they are gone and can never be recovered. Somebody else got dozens of those moments with my oldest daughter, moments I missed, that I only heard about and couldn't really treasure as mine.

This raising of children takes time, and it is a race against the clock. What seems like an eternity when they are born becomes frighteningly short as adolescence charges into your life. Not that toddlers don't take time and energy, there were those days when my husband came home to find all 4 of us in tears, but the time is filled with providing. You are cleaning, feeding, chasing, redirecting, exhausted by the routines that make you doubt your stay at home choice. But I am finding the teen years out distance the toddler ones in that time category. They scream for it more often but when offered, it isn't unusual for them to just sulk and ignore you. I have gone for a walk with my daughter, we hoofed it for two hours before her real concerns emerged. What if I didn't have those two hours to give, she would remain anxious and that takes us to worlds we don't care to visit. I find the same is true with many issues, the child will get around to whatever is bothering her only after much time as been invested in gibberish. And the need for parental involvement escalates as well, not again that toddler years aren't filled with dangers, but coffee table collisions trade up to automobile ones. Good choices use to be all about food, and not writing on the walls, but now include sex, drugs, and abandoning parental values. Inserting yourself into the life of a busy teen when you only have an hour is almost impossible.

So I have the job of my choice but my primary employers will be leaving me in a few short years and I need to figure out what I want to be when I grow up besides a grandmother. My BC life included full time work in the retail world, and that was never my dream. Regional offices were what I held and the time and travel commitments required I have no desire to resume. So I need to find something new, six years should give me enough time to discover my other passion.

If my current life would just slow down, it would make everything a whole lot simpler.

When Reading is Hard

I am gifted with two profoundly dyslexic children, and as a result am finding myself learning what books work for the reading challenged. So here are a few suggestions when you are faced with a child who is required to read something for school. These titles can also be strewn about the house to tempt the reluctant reader. I apologize for the girl bias but that is my reality.

Do not miss "The Cat on the Mat is Flat" and "The Big Fat Cow that Went Kapow" these look like regular young reader novels but are really Dr Seuss-esque rhymes with surprize endings, they even include some new vocabulary words, like shonky and wonky, By Andy Griffin of the "Butt Wars" fame

Babymouse by Jennifer Holm, a "graphic novel" series that is fun funny and lets kids read the bubbles. Babymouse is also a character who's imagination knows few bounds and is written by an award winning author.

Stink and Judy Moody are two series written by Megan McDonald, I don't like how the siblings treat each other but good lessons are usually learned in each story. A big plus for this one is the actual page layout, they got it right especially for the kids with the visual processing challenges, the font size is great, and they still have pictures. Stink is a little easier read than Judy so that would be the place to start.

Short books that are still thought provoking for the middle school student might be "Missing May" by Rylant, On My Honor" by Bauer, "Stone Fox" by Gardner, "Witness" by Hesse, "Love That Dog"and "Pleasing the Ghost" by Creech, "Skeleton Man" by Bruchac, "The Cay" by Taylor and "Skinny Bones" by Park. All of these offer things to talk about and could definitely be book report material.

Books in verse are another option for the reluctant reader, two of those above are also in this category. The poetry offers fewer words per page and insists on accurate word selection but all of these still tell a story that is easy to follow. "Out of Dust" by Hesse, I prefer "Witness" personally but it does fall into this verse category. "Dead on Town Line" by Conner, our mother/daughter group enjoyed this one but all felt it wasn't finished, a great start none the less. Ellen Hopkins has a series of books, these are teen/young adult novels that are filled with trauma, angst, suicide, drugs, and sex. Not for the faint of heart but they do pull you in and keep you reading. My favorite in this category is "Make Lemonade" by Wolfe, an amazing story that reads like elegant prose yet is all in verse. It is a trilogy so there is more if you like it.

Do I have to mention "Wimpy Kid?" The original was actually written for adults but no one would publish it for grown-ups, so they went with the kid option. The lexile is actually listed at 950 I believe for the first novel, which can be quite a stretch for the struggling reader, but if they ask to read it, hand it over. They will work though the hard bits just because they want to be like everyone else, and it is funny.

Action packed stories also pull these reluctant readers in and keep their interest high enough that plowing through the words is worth it. "Alex Rider" takes the cake in this category with a near death experience every 10 pages. Lots of explosions, death, mayhem, and violence put this in the teen category but my girls were just 9 when they started listening to these and they loved them, even my sensitive one was not bothered by all the blood and guts but seems to easily understand that it was all make believe. The current best selling "Percy Jackson" series by Riordan is another fast paced winner,

Books in journal, letter, diary or IM format also seem to appeal to those allergic to books. The Myracle series TTFN, TTYL, L8R G8R, and BFF is worth a look, I did get tired of all the whining and lack of action, they didn't do anything except chat and text, but it has some young girl teen appeal. For the much younger set the Dear America series is coming back, these are diaries or journals of historical characters that were very well done and I never understood why they quit publishing them. "Regarding the Sink" by Klise is a fun one and this author has several titles that fall into this category, her stories are told by not just letters but newspaper clippings, receipts, bills, post-its, and messages. Myers "Monster" is another with this visual appeal and don't miss "The Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian" by Alexi, it's a real gem. Older kids for both those last titles.

My brain is slowing so you will have to start with those and I will find others later.

Potty talk

I continue to be appalled at the crude behavior of people. This summer I attended a music event with my daughter, the venue was outside but bless the organizers there was no need to rely on the port-o-potties, but they actually have reasonably clean serviceable facilities. As the day progressed those nice bathrooms began to deteriorate. It was interesting that the stalls nearest the sinks and more heavily trafficed were the ones to survive the day. Those stalls around the wall away from too many eyes became hot beds of malicious activity. Throughout the day young women had managed to put out of commission at least 90% or the available toilets? WHY? I really don't get this one, eventually even the destroyer has to use this room, why is it funny to create unnecessary stentch and filth, plug drains and pipes, in a room that you will need. I truely was shocked at the destruction, it was going to take several hours of nauseating work to make all the facilitites serviceable.

This doesn't just happen at young peoples concerts, and youth have no monopoly on crude behavior in the bathroom. Visit any public toilet on a day when it has seen frequent activity and you will find a mess, unless there really is someone scheduled hourly to put on the gloves and take on the gruesome task of cleaning up after humanity. So can anyone explain to me why this happens? Is putting paper in a trash can, turning off water, peeing INTO the toilet instead of on it, flushing a comode all that difficult? By the looks of public washrooms these tasks must be insurmountable, we have failed out children once again in the transfer of the most basic of skills. Restroom attendants may be the only real solution, it's like having a mom in place to keep everyone on their best behavior, and I don't believe it would be much more expensive than the hours the clean up crew has to put in to repair damage.

Book Babble

Books again, maybe some sleepers, oft overlooked titles that are really good. A favorite for the younger kid needing a historical fiction title for school is Snow Treasure by McSwigan, based on an incident from WWII where a freighter showed up in New York harbor laden to the point of sinking, it's cargo gold. How the gold, belonging to Norway, is sneaked out of their country under the noses of Nazi's is the story premise, fun for boys and girls alike.

A Crooked Kind of Perfect, and Waiting for Normal are girl stories where day to day life for some preteen girls offers more than normal challenges and experiences that will make audiences grateful for uncomplicated lives. On My Honor an integrity story where lying has some awful consequences. Leap of Faith by Bradley, ' tis rare for religion to be treated so respectfully in a kid book, and this one goes way beyond respectful and gets it's Catholic facts right as well, great read on top of it all.

When the Whistle Blows by Slayton, I thought this one deserved a Newbery Honor at least last year. An amazing story told in vignettes that take place on All Hallow's Eve, through these snapshots of life you get to know a town, a man, a family, what life was like in simpler times, and that heros don't always look like heros. Harris and Me, everybody reads Hatchet but this one is Paulsen at his finest. Harris defines family and fun and is one of those few kid titles that make you laugh out loud often. Emma Jean Lazarus Fell Out of a Tree, a quirky kid, Emma Jean must be on that ASD list somewhere but even quirky kids deserve and need friends, Emma learns this in her own special way.

Rash, a great boy read and discussion starter, is a sci-fi story years in the future where the USA is now the USSA, United Safety State of America. Football is illegal so are large dogs and most anything deemed unsafe, walking helmets keep you from hurting yourself, in even the most mundane of activity. But if you have an anger management problem and a bit of a rebellious streak you aren't long for life out of prison and prison is as unregulated, as the outside is constrained. Read at your own risk.

For the wee ones Three Tales of my Father's Dragon by Gannett, get this and read it out loud while they are young as your children will never pick this up on their own, and while at the library do the same with Homer Price by McCloskey of duckling fame, another romp through a small town that leaves you wistful for days gone by.

Those should keep you busy for this month, enjoy. In the meantime I am going to find out how to post photos, all this black needs some color.

Homeschool Hell Week

We homeschool and the perks far outweigh the drawbacks but there are those weeks when I ask myself, what was I thinking. Three young women exploding with erratic and errant hormones is enough to bring the strongest working mom to her knees. For the SAHomeschoolingM there is no escape. Well, I guess that isn't quite true, because I do leave the house often now without anyone in tow. But this family life we have chosen builds pretty incredible relationships and puts you first in line for the best and the worst the kids have to offer.

As normal as my children appear and as stable as folks think our life must be, chaos lurks just below the surface. Twelve is a particularly challenging age, and when mild anxiety is thrown into the mix, volitility results. We hold her tight and help her breathe, but often the eruptions spiral upward so quickly that there isn't time to coach. It isn't unusual for this one to scream and declare she hates me, you would think after the numerous repetitions of this that I would become immune, but there is still a strong emotional gut reaction. Somehow it always feels personal, and as much as I know that she will tell me she didn't mean it when we can finally speak rationally, and that bad voice inside says, "You must not be a good mother."

Best Story of the Week

A friend of mine had one of those days...it began with the loss of a crown. She was able to get an appointment that morning and the dentist took all the necessary impressions for a proper replacement and glued a temporary crown in place, saying "That will hold you until the real one comes in." Well, as a snack that afternoon my friend decided on popcorn, maybe not the best choice for a temporary crown, but her choice. The inevitable happened on a crunchy kernal, the crown popped off. She carefully placed the crown on the table next to the bag of popcorn and set to planning another visit to the dentist. Daughter arrives and spots the bag of popcorn, instead of reaching in she first decides to pick up and consume all the stray bits on the table.

"This tastes awful" she says while spitting out the now mangled bit of metal.

At least her dentist will get a chuckle along with his extra work.